i'm gonna write two post today, since i felt two contradictive things. this one's called oktober abu-abu.
mengapa oh mengapa oktober menjadi abu-abu? hmmm it supposed to be the happiest month. f all since i'm having my birthday on this month. i just felt that today has turned this month to the worst month so far. i'm tired. and this is too much. just too much of everything. too much to handle. too much pressure. too much orang yang sakit. too much pengeluaran. too much makan. too much loneliness..
and everything bercampur baur jadi satu. i wish i could say i'm strong. but i'm not. i wish i could do lotsa different thingss, instead all i choose were wrong choices. i wish i could be the hero of the month who could save the day and make it colorful again. but i'm not. and i won't.
desperado. maybe you can call me that now.
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